Bedtime Routine

I am a regular reader of “The Wine Dark Sea” blog [www.thewinedarksea.com/weblog.php].  Melanie’s Bella and my Gman are about the same age.  Only Gman is an only child [sob] and Bella is the oldest of 3, soon to be 4.  Our bedtime routine is vastly different but we’re trying to make it better and get the little man to bed sooner so that he can get more sleep.  Having started PreSchool for the second year and just turned 5 we’re dealing with a bit of defiant behavior and I think getting enough rest might be the cure [or at least the beginning of one].

 

Our bedtime usually starts at 7:30 [we’re going to move it up to 7:00 beginning tonight] with me telling Gman to go upstairs, get undressed, and go potty.  At which point he usually has something he HAS to do ….. like snuggle his blankey on the couch or finish a “project”, etc.  Which ends up with me counting to 3 and pointing up the stairs where he reluctantly heads with an “Alright, I’m going already.”, insert huffy sigh here.  I would like to say that he’s really obedient and I use the few minutes it takes him to undress to finish up the dishes and do whatever small task I need to accomplish before I head upstairs myself.  Unfortunately, I finish what I’m doing and head upstairs to find him fully dressed and playing or laying on the floor snuggling blankey.  At which point my frustration levels begin to rise.  If ultimatums are issued downstairs I may occasionally find a naked boy, but rarely a pottied boy.  So once undressing is commenced or finished [shirts can be tricky for little arms and big heads] we head to the bathroom.  Sometimes using the potty is a quick and easy thing, but some nights “privacy” is required and then I’m guaranteed at least 5 minutes to do things like getting jammies ready or folding laundry.  I’ve found that brushing teeth before we head into the shower to be a time saver, as he hates having them brushed and fights me on it.  I can have the shower water warming up while I struggle to get a bit of cooperation.  And my frustration levels rise.  Once teeth are finished the water is usually warm [not always in the winter] and he gets into the shower.  He backs into the water and drenches his head.  I dump a bunch of baby wash on his head and soap him down from his hair to his toes, all at once.  His face gets washed at the same time.  He then backs back into the shower spray and I rinse his head and letting the water sluice down him so that he’s completely rinsed.  If it’s late then I turn off the water and dry him off.  If it’s still relatively early I let him play in the water for a few minutes.  Once he’s dried I send him to his room and this time he usually listens and gets himself dressed in his PJs [which I lay out for him].  If Dad’s home we all head into Gman’s room.  Dad and I kneel next to the bed and Gman lies on top of it.  I have to commandeer blankey and any stuffed animals residing in the bed or it’s too much distraction.  We say our prayers … Hail Mary, O My Jesus, Eternal Rest, and one from my childhood that blesses everyone in the family, especially the children.  Then Dad and I climb into bed on either side of Gman and I give back the comfort items and we read a book.  Sometimes it’s a picture book …. Andrew Henry’s Meadow, One Kitten for Kim, Tikki Tikki Tembo, Library Mouse, etc, but sometimes we also read chapter books …. Stuart Little, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, Prince Caspian, Flat Stanley, etc.  Once the book is read Dad turns off the light and Gman sings us a made up lullaby.  It’s really sweet and often completely erratic and nonsensical and we have no idea what he’s singing about.  But we love it just the same and ask for one every night.  Then we all lay there together until Gman falls asleep.  If Dad’s home I sometimes sneak out and some nights if I have stuff to do I leave Gman with a stack of picture books and the lights on so that he can “read” to himself.  Usually the reading never happens and he falls asleep without having picked up one of the books.  I know some people don’t think we should indulge him with laying down to put him to sleep.  I know my mom thinks he’ll never learn to put himself to sleep if we continue to do this, but I doubt that I’m going to have to go to college with him to help him get to sleep.  I love snuggling with him and watching him fall asleep.  The long blinks, the attempt to keep the eyes open, the sudden limpness of his body, the soft, even sound of his breathing, the way he throws his arm over my neck or his blankey over my head.  It’s all good.

 

So that’s our routine.  The only thing I really want to change [besides getting more cooperation] is getting an earlier start.  I’d like him to be asleep by 8 instead of turning out the lights at 8:30.  So we’re going to try for an earlier bedtime or an earlier start to bedtime.  It’s hard when I don’t get home until 5:30, but I have to sacrifice part of my evening with him so that he can get more rest.  Not fun for me, but essential for him.

re: Friday last

Gman and Dad managed to find the play-doh machine without destroying my house or getting grumpy.

Gman has been so fun lately. One day we planted seeds. He didn’t get his hands in the dirt [he doesn’t like to get dirty] but he did drop the seeds in the holes I made. Then when I was bringing the seeds inside he built a “movie theater” on the old entertainment cabinet. He set up his play-doh box on top of 2 canisters of play-doh and arranged the light so that it shone directly onto the box. He set up a chair right next to it so that ‘movie-goers’ could sit and watch the box. When I sat in the chair he proceeded to tell me the entire Toy Story 2 plot line. He wanted me to sit for a retelling of Cars, but unfortunately it was dinner time and I wasn’t in the mood for dinner and a movie.

Weekend update

Good weekend this weekend.  I was really irritable on Saturday for no apparent reason.  Okay, the reason was really petty and I feel bad about it.  I got woken up.  Yep, that’s it.  We didn’t get to bed until after midnight on Friday, which is not unusual.  But Saturday is my ONLY day to get any uninterrupted sleep if Gman doesn’t wake up early or come and get in bed with us in the middle of the night.  Neither of which he did Friday night.  Yay!!!!  BUT ……. [can you hear the ominous music?] …. Tom had to go to a funeral Saturday morning and one of his friends called at 7 AM to see if he needed a ride.  The funeral was for a young policeman killed in the line of duty and it was going to be very crowded so the friend called to see if Tom needed a ride.  Which he did not, but it was certainly nice of the friend to call.  HOWEVER ….. I was not happy to be woken up after less than 7 hours of sleep.  Most days I get 5 hours, 6 if I’m lucky or sleep through the alarm clock and don’t shower before work.  I was really hoping for a solid 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep.  No dice.  Because once the phone rang I had to get up and go to the bathroom.  And then Gman woke up.  And then Dad had to get up and get ready while Gman talked his ear off.  And then I had to get up and distract Gman so that Dad could get ready.  All of which put me in a really irritable mood.  Which I then took out on my innocent son.  Nothing horrendous, just a general snippiness and lack of patience instead of good humor about little set backs.  It really upset Tom though.  Not that his friend called, but that I was SO, SO, SO out of patience.  I’m not usually like that.  I get irritable occasionally, but not for a whole day of foul moodiness.

 

But even though I was irritable we still managed to eat breakfast, get changed into swim clothes, I got a shower and we left for swim lessons.  WITHOUT UNDERWEAR.  That’s right.  My poor son wore his swim suit to swimming and I didn’t bring any underwear for him to wear once lessons were over.  Luckily for me, after a fruitless stop at Walgreens – they don’t carry children’s underwear for those who are interested – I remembered a TJ Maxx in the neighborhood.  So one 3-pack of 4T underwear later we went to my mom’s house and ate lunch.  After lunch we headed to the pumpkin patch – not the big fancy one that I initially intended, the little church run one right around the corner – and had a great time.  Gman got to jump on the “castle/rocket ship” enclosed trampoline thing with some big kids, we picked out 3 big pumpkins – one for Dad, one for Mom, and one for Gman and 3 baby gourds that looked like pumpkins and only cost $0.50 each.  Then Gman got to pull them to the car in a red wagon and got to be pulled back to the jumpy thing by me.  He loved it.  He also got to use the church bathroom, which he loved.  He loves going to different bathrooms, especially ones that have locking doors so that he can lock himself in.  It makes him feel very big.

 

After the pumpkin patch we headed home to Daddy who was back from the funeral.  While Dad worked on Gman’s play house, Gman and Mom took a nap.  It was necessary.  It doesn’t count toward uninterrupted sleep, but it did put me in a better mood.  Grandma was leaving Sunday for Nashville to take care of Uncle Bill while he recovers from surgery so we had her over to our house for salads [YUMMY!] and a quick good bye.  She left early the next morning and will be gone for quite some time.  Prayers for a speedy recovery for Uncle Bill and safe journey for Grandma.  Then bath for the boy and bed.

 

Sunday after Mass I tried to cut off my finger.  I was making an omelet and cutting up greasy bacon to put into it and the knife slipped or my finger slipped and I cut myself pretty badly.  Didn’t require stitches, but I did almost pass out.  Just got a little light-headed.  Dad had to get me a band-aid, finish the omelet [which turned out pretty good], and put up with my whining.  Gman was really sweet and worried.  He gave me his last Spiderman band-aid and kissed my finger to make it better.  After brunch Gman and I took another nap [less than 6 hours for me, but even more importantly, less than 9 hours for him and he’s still a growing boy] while Dad read the paper and watched football.  Gman got up and watched a bit of football after he woke up and then he and Dad worked on his playhouse until he grew bored with that and decided to use his little dull axe to strip the bark off a log.  That lasted until it was time to come in and get ready.  Dad and Mom went out to eat using a gift certificate Grandma gave them and even better, Gman got to go spend the evening with his sisters at his oldest sister’s apartment.  He had 2 sisters, 2 sister’s roommates, and one little dog to play with, movies to watch, and toys to show off.  He even got to eat a hot dog and M&M’s for dinner.  He was in heaven.  And then Mom and Dad came and got him and he got to go home and tell them all about his night and how much fun he had and what he did and then a nice hot bath, prayers, a book and bed.  We all had a good day and a nice weekend.

 

This week we have karate, music, swimming and taking care of Grandma’s house, Halloween, All Saints Day party at school, and a block party after trick or treating.  We’re also planning to start teaching Gman to say the Rosary.  We’re starting with a decade and moving up to the full Rosary by Christmas.  A full but wonderful week to which to look forward.  Hopefully I’ll stay in a better mood!

 

The weekend update

We had a good weekend.  Friday school was cancelled due to ill health among the students and staff [and was cancelled again on Monday] so I went to work at 5 AM so that I could be home by 2 PM and Dad could go to work at 2:15 PM.  That way Gman got to stay at home with Mom and Dad.  We did the same thing on Monday and each day Gman and Mom got to take a nap.  Nothing more cuddly than a boy all warm and sweet smelling waking up from a nap.  I got lots of snuggles and cuddles and some good couch snuggling time.  Saturday after swim lessons [Daddy stayed home and did laundry and cut the grass – what a wonderful man!] we met up with Uncle Ned and Cousin Lucy [who is only days older than Gman] at the local McDonalds.  Uncle Ned and mom got to sit and chat while Gman and Luce climbed and played on the indoor jungle gym thingy.  Tentative plans were made for going to the pumpkin patch next weekend.  And food was eaten by Gman.  He ate his nuggets with hardly any complaint and then drank almost all of his milk.  Friday night I “made” frozen cheese pizza for dinner and he ate 3 – count ‘em, 3, adult pieces of pizza for dinner [complaining afterward of a tummy ache, but some potty time, a little burping, and a hot bath and all was fine in the universe].  I think someone is going through a growth spurt.  It makes sense since his shirt sleeves, shirts might I add that I just bought in early August, are all getting too short.  After playing with Cousin Lucy we took a trip to the library.  Gman has his own library card, but we always use mine.  I had some books on hold so we picked those up.  And then we raided the kids section.   I think we must have gotten over 50 books.  I have a few that I love that I get for him, or ones that other parents have recommended that I think he’ll like, and then I let him pick a bunch for himself.  He loves that part as he feels like a very big kid picking out his own stories.  So between the 2 of us we managed to overfill 3 canvas bags – the kind the stores now sell for those who don’t want paper or plastic – and ended up ripping the handle off one, much to my embarrassment.  Several people offered to help me out to the car, but I was too self-conscious to take anyone up on it.  Instead I had Gman sit in the armchairs by the door with one of the bags [I was parked right across from the entrance] and took 2 bags out and then came back and got the broken handle bag and Gman.  By this time [after 2 PM] someone was pretty tired – that would be me, although I could tell Gman was losing energy quickly, so we came home and watched a DVD instead of taking a nap, Dick van Dyke in the classic Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, always a favorite – great sing along songs.  I tidied a bit, read an adult book a bit, and napped a bit – all while Gman sang along.  And then we crafted.  We took all of Gman’s papers and projects from preschool and punched holes in them [or glued them to a piece of construction paper where necessary and punched holes in that paper], made pages labeled A – E [that’s as far as he’s gotten in the alphabet] and put them all in a binder labeled Gman’s ABC book.  I think it’s cute, but already very full.  The rest of the night was spent eating dinner, taking a bath, saying prayers, and reading a book [I forget what but I think it was Stanley Mows the Lawn].

 

Sunday was more restful.  We got up for 8 AM Mass and afterward had doughnuts in the basement.  We met a nice family that has a teen-age son, Sean, who is autistic.  Sean and Gman ran and played for 45 minutes while we talked to Sean’s mom first and then when mom went off to collect for a Christmas present for our Pastor, we talked to Dad.  We also got to have a nice conversation with another family that we really like.  I want Gman to marry their youngest daughter who is only days older than him.  After that we went home and took a family nap.  I love snuggling up to my boys and settling down to sleep together.  I don’t know what it is about sleeping all together in our bed, but there’s something just so cozy about it.  Dad and I get under the covers and Gman sleeps on top between us [to keep him from falling out of bed].  This day I guess we were cold or something because we were crowding him [the boy who always drapes an arm or leg over both of us and sleeps sideways so that Dad and I each get 6 inches of the queen size bed while he hogs the center] and he flipped around so that his head was by the foot of the bed.  However we slept, Gman and I were out of it.  We slept 2 ½ hours!  Needless to say, it was a good thing that school got cancelled because he wasn’t going to go to sleep at bedtime.  After nap and some laundry, Dad went to work and Gman and I went to Grandma’s for dinner.  Gman ate his salad and pork chop, but not without a fight.  Only the threat of no Grandma cookies got him through.  My younger sister says watching the fight that takes place over meals between me and Gman is great birth control.  After dinner we went home and went through all of my clothes that have been squirreled away for years at the top of the closet [too high up for me to reach].  Gman put on my boots and thought he looked like a cowboy.  He also took all the give-aways off the hangers and made a nest in the hallway.  Once we were done with clothes we played baby and mama bird in the clothing nest.  Then we gathered it all up, brushed teeth, said prayers, and read a third Stanley book [we had read Stanley Goes Fishing for naptime and Stanley Goes for a Drive at bedtime – by the way, I don’t recommend the Stanley books.  I think they’re kind of weird.  We won’t be getting them again from the library and they are going back as soon as I can get my act together to make a return trip].

 

So now it’s Tuesday.  Monday was spent with Dad in the morning and Mom in the afternoon.  We napped [again] and then ate dinner and went grocery shopping.  Nothing much exciting.  Just want to keep tabs on what we do so that years from now I can look back and remember.

Crabby Butt

I hate it when I am really crabby and cranky at Gman.  He’s little and I know he can be overwhelmingly persistent and somewhat annoying, but I need to remember that these are the formative years.  The way I treat him now will impact him for years to come.  I grabbed his hands during night prayers last night and held them even when he tried to pull them away.  I don’t think I hurt him, I was only holding his hands, but still ….  I need you all to pray for me that I can be a better, more patient mother.  I need to become more like the Blessed Virgin.  I need to let go of this world and put myself more firmly in the arms of my Savior and ask Him to guide me and lead me on His path.  Please, God, help me to become more like the Blessed Virgin Mary.  Help me to raise my son the way that she raised Yours.  And even more, help me to guide him closer and closer to You so that he may walk the path You have ordained for him.  I ask this through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with You on High.  Amen

 

Anne

 

Happy Anniversary Baby

Today is Tom and my 10^th anniversary [of our 1^st date].  We went to dinner at Norton’s then out to Milo’s on the Hill.  And it was the night of our first kiss.  Who could have guessed that the next 10 years would bring:  the girls moving in, a new house, marriage, high school graduation x2, college graduation, rehab x2, college expulsion, home expulsion, baby conception and birth, baby conception and miscarriage, water pipe bursting, home remodeling x a billion, 4 cats down to no cats, fights and making up, romance, Nubby-Butt squirrels, every day wonderful, every day general, messy rooms, clean rooms, old furniture, new furniture, money troubles, money windfalls, taxes, parental death x3, preschool, talking, walking, sass, learning and growing, pumpkin patches, Christmas x10, family parties, family fights, nephews, nieces, great nephews and nieces, baptisms, making friends, losing friends, hunting and killing deer, eating deer, internet poltergeists, cable, dish TV, cable, antenna, meetings out of town, vacations, Catholicism, Traditional Tridentine Rite, Novus Ordo, Latin Mass, St. Andrew Missal, Marian Missal, Roman Missal 1962, promotions, raises, bicycles, birthdays, weight gain, weight loss, disease, medicine, apple picking, baking, gardening, lawn work, ……

 

And the list goes on.  All of it together.  Has it only been 10 years?  It feels like we just met yesterday and that we’ve known each other forever.  You are my best friend.  The person I want to talk to first thing in the morning and last thing at night.  I love you, honey.  Happy Anniversary.

Sun bugs

You know those motes of dust that float through the air?  Well, according to Gman, they are “Sun bugs”.  He was sitting on the potty and I pulled a bit of TP off [sure to set the lint a-flyin’] and he started swatting at the air.  I asked “What are you doing?” and he replied, “I’m trying to catch one of the sun bugs, Mommy!  Try to catch one!”  Too funny, but makes perfect sense.  If you didn’t know any better what would you think if you saw hundreds of little white things randomly flying through the air, but only in the sunlight?